Sunday, October 12, 2008

What was I saying about turning a corner?

I was feeling okay this morning, that is until I went into town to do some shopping. Who did I see in Safeway but my neighbour Kelly, looking oh-so-maternal at 27 weeks.

Out of politeness I stopped to say hello, only because I thought she'd seen me, otherwise I would have ducked for cover. There was this awkwardness between us that was never there before, I think Kelly feels uneasy because she has an obviously pregnant belly and I don't.

I fucking hate this, I'm so angry at.. well, at whoever thinks I'm not fit enough to be a mother and keeps stripping me of every opportunity. When will they just fuck off and leave me alone?

Bitterness and pregnancy envy, two very ugly emotions... I really do wish I didn't feel this way, it seems to consume me at times.

No comments: